Now, its almost a few months ago since I published my latest blog post. In the beginning, I was clearly setting myself the goal that I am going to publish one blog post every month. Well, that was before I could even imagine getting a Mommy for the first time.
The most important work you will ever do will be within the wall of your own home.
What happened since them?
I thought it could be helpful in sharing my first 6 months with you. And please keep in mind this all does not have to happen to you it is just how I went through all the steps being a first time Mommy. Not sure, if you heard the following sentence: “…being a Mom is a fulltime job.”
Is it even true?
I did hear it years ago… but never understood what the people (Mommies) mean by that. Now, after 6 months, I do.
But do not understand me wrong. That should not scare you.
I knew when I found out that I am pregnant, nothing will be the same anymore. Good or Bad?
I do have a lot of Mommy friends but never really talked with them about the topic “how is it being a Mom”? Every woman which is expecting a baby for the first time does not know how their lives are going to change. Thinking about the situation when I found out about getting a Mom, I knew I will figure it out anyway.
Being a mother is learning about the strength you didn’t know you had and dealing with fears you never know existed.
When did I see the first changes?
I would say, it was from the day when I was tested positive and I knew now is going to start a new part of my life. My partner and I had to have a lot of conversations all about our/my thoughts.
From starting to feel like Mommy until what kind of birth class we will go through to be ready for this new life. We did not have only 1 or 2 conversations; we really had a thousand… I would say. But this kind of thing you can read in a few blog posts before. Let us move on now.
The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.
How did all go after we came home from the hospital?
After 4 days in the hospital, I could not wait to get home. At the same time, I guess, I was a little scared too. As my partner was at home for the first 4 weeks to help me, I felt a little better. It was still very overwhelming and I fall into this “postpartum” they are talking about.
Remembering the day, when I was sitting in the back of the car and watching my baby sleeping, while my partner was driving home… It still feels like yesterday.
I did not really realize being a Mom, yet.
Anyway, arriving home after 20 minutes of driving we got a big surprise with a lot of presents and it was decorated with a stork where his name and the date when he was born on it. There was baby cloth above the door.
This was such an amazing surprise. When we opened the door, Honey was already waiting for us. That is our cat. I was so happy to see her.
Just did not know how she is going to react when we come home with our little one. But it was all fine, she was very curious and calm.
It was a great feeling being home.
Normally, coming home from the hospital would mean for others to get comfortable and relaxing. But as most of us know me. This was not even that what I was thinking about as I said to my partner, we must clean the apartment before I can take a break. Our little boy was sleeping for I think the next 1 – 2 hours.
So, the time was there to clean up the apartment. I just could not relax immediately as I said to my partner, I am not here to do nothing now. I must do something.
Well, I would say that it is not a good habit. There is some improvement to make. Cleaning is not everything, but to feel good in a place that you call your home is important.
How would you continue after coming home and being Mom for the first time?
I would really like to have a conversation about that and maybe I put this topic into my Instagram profile so that we can have an exchange in relation to this.
Now, I would like to talk about the following which could be something extremely helpful for you:
When did I or we find some routine in our new life?
I am like an impatient person and I had this kind of habit. If you even can call it a habit.
The beginning was not easy. I am happy that I had an amazing midwife. As I was breastfeeding, which was quite difficult for me tbh. I had some very painful days with a lot of tears at the beginning.
Finding the right routine for that part was not easy at all. I had milk already in the hospital and so, I could give him the best from the best. As of the fact, that our little one was not gaining enough weight in the first 3 weeks, which lead us to the bottle as well, made me in fact sad. I started having self-doubts and really got into a little depression, I would say.
As it needs time?
Yes, it does, everything new you are going to start needs time. Nobody is perfect and we can learn every day and do things better the next day.
If I made it in finding the right routine for me and the little one?
It took awhile I would say, but I did have a good start. And you know what, it does not have to be perfect at all.
I remember that my midwife told me to find for the beginning of the routine to find some relaxing moments for the breastfeeding. Which I made, as you must be calm and relaxed that the baby can drink without any stress.
At the beginning of March, my partner went back to work and I knew the day had to come when I needed to get it done on my own. I was talking about that with my midwife as well and she gave me helpful tips and came a few more times in the beginning.
I figured out I had to get some morning and eventually evening routine into my new day structure.
What did I do to get into a routine?
First, I knew he needs to get cleaned up and creamed before dressing for the bed. Later, it was important with the 1st tooth to get into the tooth brushing time as well. I also created a playlist for this morning and evening routine which I put on that he knows what kind of time we are having now.
Can I do it always the same way?
Well, I cannot. Some things I must adjust the way how he is feeling. And that is totally fine for me. I always think about myself. I do have my own morning and evening routine as well, but as a Mommy, I must adjust to things as well.
First, the routine should help him to find into the sleep and in the morning, I help him to find into the day. I do not have to do as our little one is a happy baby and he smiles always.
What did I learn from the first 6 months of being a Mommy?
Stress does not help you and your little one. You and your partner both must work together as a team. In most of the cases, it is like that, Mommy is taking care of the baby and Daddy is working. You must sit down together and make you work together and not against each other.
I would not say it works perfectly for both of us, but we learn from each of us and work towards things to get better. We do have days where we get angry with each other as each of us has some habits which get us very annoying.
But, if you talk and take the time to work on those things, it will get better. Therefore, let’s end with this and I hopefully will get more into this topic in a later post or article of mine.
Motherhood is a million little moments that God weaves together with grace. Redemption, laughter and tears, and most of all love.
I wish you all the best and stay safe and healthy.
Stay in touch